Ratus Packus

In preparing for our road trip, we need to do a major cleaning out. At least half of our belongings will need to go somewhere else. This can be a particularly emotional challenge for anyone but especially if one’s family is of the Ratus packus.
A couple of years ago I thought the Big Dude was old enough and mature enough to make decisions about getting rid of things that he had outgrown (Instead of having his Mom sneak into his room while he is away visiting his grandparents and haul off cart loads of stuff). So, being a clever Mom, I had a plan to help him learn the skill of cleaning out. I gave him three boxes; one, for things he had outgrown and wanted to pass on to the Lil’ Dude, one for the thrift store and one for trash. I gave him the instructions then left closing his bedroom door so that he could have quiet and complete concentration while making these difficult decisions. Three hours later he still had not emerged from his room and I thought “great! He must be making a lot of progress!” I was so excited to see how he was doing I went into his room to check. The three boxes were sitting there EMPTY except for the trash box which had ONE dirty tissue in it. One, just one, that’s it. All of a sudden, I wasn’t feeling so clever. I made a mental note “this plan does not work on family members of the Ratus Packus.”
So, here we are, weeks from departure and we really need to get rid of stuff. The Dudes are not generation X’ers or Y’ers they are of the generation Xtra’s meaning too much stuff. It’s a double whammy. It’s time for some tough love. I decided on a more focused approach. I would give them each one box and tell them to clean out JUST their stuffed animals. I instructed them to keep the ones that were special to them but the rest would need to go. As a clincher, I added, “wouldn’t it be nice to give some of these stuffed animals to the children at the hospital (I deem it permissible for parents to turn the “guilt screw” just a tad on occasions like this). Just think how happy the children would be to receive a present like that.”
I know THEY like to receive presents as evidenced by the recent Valentine’s Day. The Dudes each received a card and a ten dollar bill from their grandparents. When the Lil’ Dude called to Thank them for the gift he said “Thank-you for the card and ten dollars, Granny, but why didn’t you send me a box full of presents? All you have to do is give it to the USP guy and he will deliver it to our house.”
So, it came as a surprise when they both emerged from their rooms within an hour dragging their boxes behind them as they were too heavy to lift. I secretly smiled.
I took the load to the hospital and have been giving them to select patients who are particularly brave or scared and every single one has clutched the stuffed animal to their chest with a smile that stretches from ear to ear. Every afternoon on the way home from school, I tell the Dudes about the 2 year old cancer patient that received the purple elephant or the 4 year cardiac patient that received the small brown teddy bear etc. and their reactions to receiving the gift.
Now, in the afternoon, when I pick up the Dudes from the bus stop, the Lil’ Dude eager to hear the story, excitedly asks “Mommy, which stuffed animal did you give away today?”

Gettin’ is good but givin’ is better even for those of the Ratus Packus.

“Giving frees us from the familiar territory of our own needs by opening our mind to the unexplained worlds occupied by the needs of others.” Barbara Bush